It’s 3:33 am. Why am I awake? I wonder. I go to the bathroom, do my business and return to my cozy warm bed. J sleeps next to me, arms wrapped around a pillow, he looks so child-like. I curl next to him to sleep.
BAM! My mind shifts into overdrive, going from 0 to 60 in 3 seconds.
The day’s events race through my mind. The angry driver who followed me because he thought I cut him off, what if he had a gun? What would I have done? Maybe I would be dead. It was a mistake, unintentional. Why get so angry?
What was the story with the barefoot child I saw being dragged along the street? Who had her hand, sister or mother? No, not her mother, she was too young. Where were her shoes and coat, it’s cold? Maybe I should have stopped them. Why didn’t I?
I look at the clock, it’s 3:53 am. I hear a sound – click, click, click – over and over. Is that the furnace? I get up and check the other rooms. Yes, it’s there too. Why hasn’t J called the serviceman? He said he would. What if it quits? We can’t afford to replace the furnace. It stops, but with my mind still racing I listen. Then it starts again. What if it catches fire? Are there batteries in the smoke alarms? How can I sleep? I need to sleep.
The clock says 4:27 am, my mind has exhausted itself from Overthink. I drift back into a cozy, warm sleep.
Posted in response to gc and Sue’s Wednesday Challenge – Overthink.
Has this ever happened to you? Are you able to put the brakes on when it happens? Or do you just wait to run out of gas?